MAMI CHICKEN TINOLA

MAMI CHICKEN TINOLA

Edit: I was told that tinola is by definition made with ginger. For those faint of heart, warning: I forgot to buy any. So this is Mami Chicken full stop.Anyway, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. In my case, tinola is in your eyes. What gimger means to others, means nothing to me.Enjoy!
Halo everyone, and Happy Winter as we say in Canada when August ends. Well, tomorrow is a special day, the Labour Day, which we don't celebrate 1st of May as the rest of the world because as you know Canada is on a different time zone so here it arrives a bit late. Probably on a boat. But since it conveniently interfered with my plans to go to work and do overtime ( because the paradox makes that you don't work on Labour day), I've decided to get back to an older cooking challenge, which is the first recipe that gloriously failed, the Chicken Tinola. But now, with experience under the hood and some new power torque in shape of wooden cooking spoons, courtesy of R, I will let the fusion cooking take over and guide me through the process of improving the flavors every step of the way.
As my mom used to say, if the first time you don't succeed, get rich and pay for a cook. Since I'm not gonna pay (out of principle), I'm gonna explain you how to get rich easily!

CLUE 1: get some vodka cranberry . No vodka? No problem ! As I use to say . Anyway, use some and get into a fight -For the rest of the steps on how to get rich fast please read through the recipe and pay 5$ -

Chicken Tinola:
- Gloriously burn some garlic on medium heat in coconut oil while listening to your favorite country music metal radio station
- Remove it and throw it away and add onion. We don't cry ( inside or outside )this time because we found a new gadget online, anti crying onion googles. China made. At least for now till the import taxes kick in. Great thing! Makes a man be a real man and handle spices with dignity and self respect. We know all girls like that in a  guy.

CLUE 2: Loose a tooth (but win the fight). Or pretend you are indisposed from the dinner you had earlier and retreat gracefully
-Back to the pan,add some ginger into the mix, but since we forgot to get any and we are not fond of it that much we shall spice with green pepper. Hell, since we are here we shall do some red chili pepper also. Alright, and black pepper to top it! Rainbow pepper for the win. Don't worry, you can never add too much pepper, that's what R taught me. Now that the pan is full of pepper we shall rename the dish as Pepper Tinola. Add some chicken to spice the pepper.

-When the pepper is done, put some water and cover up. Now we get to the interesting bit of information. The recipe calls for green mango , but I used ripe mango ( edit: it's papaya, yes, i know) last time and we all know how that turned out, in the shape of vinegar tinola. So now we shall apply technology to replace the mango! A short search on the internet will reveal that green mango and zucchini have almost the same proteins quantity per serving and same vitamin D and B12 ( which is 0%) Therefore, my logic says they should be the same so we can easily replace one with the other in order to complete the soup. Add some slices in and replicate the sour taste using a lemon! Yuuuum!
UPDATE: it's actually papaya but it's too late to change teh picture now. who cares , anyway?

CLUE 3: Retrieve the tooth and hide it under the pillow. Wait for the tooth fairy and try to capture it in case it shows up. Drink Vietnamese Coffee to stay awake over night.
- Remove the chicken and add some green leaves in the pot. Since we don't have the ones required by the original recipe , we shall throw in some spinach! Green is green! Also add a nice chicken cube for flavor and complete with some fish sauce, but instantly regret it. Yes, every time! Fish is Fish!y

-The new twist in this tinola is that we are going to also cook pasta! Yes! As the recipe says, get some Miki pasta and boil it. Now I don't know who Miki is, but I found some Misko, which is probably the canadian immigrated eastern european relative of Miki. Well now, pasta is pasta! We put it in the pot. In order not to lose more time, add some eggs in it also. Eggs are eggs!

CLUE 4: Tooth fairy didn't show up, yet the coffee gave you energy to swipe and find some rich hot guys on tinder . Marry them and get rich. Or, wait till after Labour Day and get to work, be a boss and get rich!
Serve the pepper nice and hot on top of the pasta with eggs and onion googles. Top with burned garlic! Sarap!